It’s the time of the year again where I find myself sitting on the most beautiful train route down South to London. Just like last year, the most precious memories of the school year just ended fill my heart – the good, the bad, and some yet to be processed moments that feel weirdly scattered around within me, in desperate need of structure and evaluation that only comes with time.
The last couple of days were bittersweet. Among tearful and quiet goodbyes that made my heart ache in pain and took away my breath, there were countless moments of love, depth and just living. The heightened awareness of finality looming on my back made every moment special, attributing to it a worth and appreciation that exceeds anything that’s been before.
One of the things I learned this year is that the goodness of life is only as good as the bad of life is hard. I am only able to feel the exhilarating height of joy and contentment because I learned to allow myself to feel the depths of pain and disappointment. More than just feeling the absence of any positive feeling, I learned to conquer the state of numbness and attempted to tackle every ounce of hurt instead. I learned that to live fully means to have my heart aching while at the same time rejoicing in the goodness of all.
I have yet some of the hardest goodbyes ahead of me before I leave this little seaside town I call home for good. Until then, I will make the most out of Party June – starting now with one of my best friend’s bachelorette party.
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